Planning a wedding is a big deal for any couple—but if you’re in a same-sex relationship, there can be a few extra things to think about. Not because your wedding needs to be different, but because the experience of planning it often comes with unique choices and challenges. Whether you’re dreaming of a smaller celebration or an elegant ballroom reception, your day should reflect who you are, without pressure to fit into anyone else’s idea of tradition.
Ditch The Rules And Make It Yours
One of the best parts about a same-sex wedding is that you don’t have to follow outdated rules. You get to decide what feels right. If you both want to walk down the aisle together, go for it. If you want to wear matching outfits, or completely different ones, do what makes you feel like yourselves. You can skip anything that doesn’t fit your vibe—bouquet toss, cake cutting, the works—and keep the things that do. Your wedding should be a reflection of your personalities, not a checklist of traditions that don’t matter to you.
Choose Vendors Who Support You
When booking vendors, it’s important to work with people who genuinely support and celebrate you. From photographers to venues to florists, you want a team that’s excited to be part of your day and respects your relationship. Look for professionals who use inclusive language and who have experience working with LGBTQ+ couples. During consultations, don’t be afraid to ask if they’ve worked with same-sex weddings before or if they’re comfortable customizing roles and services. Feeling seen and respected by your vendors makes the planning process more enjoyable and less stressful.
Customize Your Ceremony
The ceremony is another chance to make things personal. There’s no strict format you have to follow, so you can completely customize how it looks and feels. Some couples choose to walk in together, while others still prefer a more traditional entrance. Having a friend or chosen family member officiate is a popular choice, especially if you want to avoid anything overly formal or religious. Your vows and ceremony script can include inclusive, meaningful language that reflects your relationship and what matters most to you both. Whether it’s lighthearted, serious, or sentimental, your ceremony should feel like the two of you.
Wear What Makes You Feel Amazing
When it comes to what you wear, the same idea applies—there are no rules. Whether you’re in suits, dresses, jumpsuits, or something totally different, your outfit should make you feel confident and comfortable. You don’t need to match unless you want to, and you certainly don’t need to follow any traditional “bride” or “groom” expectations. It’s helpful to think about how your outfits will photograph together—coordinating colors and styles can create a great look while still showing off your individual personalities. If you’re working with a stylist or visiting a bridal shop, it’s smart to call ahead and make sure they have experience working with LGBTQ+ clients so the shopping experience is smooth and respectful.
Navigate Family Dynamics With Care
Family dynamics can sometimes be complicated, especially if everyone isn’t equally supportive. If this is something you’re navigating, it’s okay to set clear boundaries and focus on surrounding yourselves with the people who uplift and love you. This might mean giving important roles to close friends, skipping parts of the day that bring stress, or creating your own new traditions. The day should feel safe, joyful, and fully yours. It’s perfectly okay to create a new kind of family celebration if that’s what makes you feel the most supported and happy.
Don’t Skip The Legal Details
It’s also a good idea to handle the legal side of things early in the planning process. Make sure you know what’s required to get a marriage license in your area, confirm that your officiant is legally allowed to marry you, and be clear on any paperwork needed for name changes if that’s something you’re planning. Some couples choose to meet with a lawyer after the wedding to update things like wills, insurance, or power of attorney—just to make sure everything is squared away for the future. These extra steps can help you feel more secure and protected as you start your next chapter.
At the end of the day, your wedding doesn’t have to fit into anyone else’s mold. What matters most is that it’s a true reflection of you and your partner. Whether it’s modern, classic, loud, quiet, big, or small, your wedding should feel like home. Celebrate your way, make it your own, and enjoy every moment of creating something meaningful together.
